Tuesday, 24 January 2012

The beginnings of my pursuit of God... or His pursuit of me.

"If I find in myself desires which nothing in this world can satisfy, I can only conclude that I was made for another world." C.S Lewis


So this is one of my favourite quotes and one of my favourite songs by Brooke Fraser-a paraphrase of a quote from C.S Lewis' 'Mere Christianity'...


 I can say that I do "find in myself desires that nothing in this world can satisfy" and have concluded that "I was made for another world." Most Importantly I have concluded that I was made by a God who loves me and who is so rich in grace and mercy that he died a horrific death so that he could win back my soul, and bring me into a relationship with Him. 


AMAZING!


Ok, so how did this come about? 
Well-your average Christian testimony begins.."I was brought up in a Christian family.."
                     and so I was, a great one who really helped me understand something of who God is and what he had done for me. 
Although I committed my life to God at a younger age, I really believe I did not see the fruits of the gospel in my life or understand something of God's grace until I came to university.


You see before I really committed my life to Christ, my relationship with him consisted of seeing how much he could do for me-when really it's NOT about ME- its ALL about HIM.
I would go through a series of short highs after Christian activities etc and then long periods of lows where I would basically turn my back on God and decide for myself what I thought was the best way to do life.


After some major mess ups, I was hit like a ton on bricks, with the realisation that if there was a God- there was no way could I live my life purposely going against his will. And if there wasn't that I would carry on living my life anyway I wanted-after all why be good if there is no ultimate purpose to this life anyway? 


And so my pursuit of God began....
To confirm my faith in Jesus, I began to check out other religions, Atheism and a series of Ultimate questions. 
My Conclusion: Jesus is the ONLY way and the only answer that satisfies. 
                   
 No other religion presents such a loving God, that even when we chose to turn our backs on him, he chose to pursue us.
                                      But how did he do this?


                      "And being found in appearance as a man, 
                                  he humbled himself 
                            by becoming obedient to death— 
                                even death on a cross!" Phil 2v8



You see the amazing thing is, this God who created the universe, chose to love me and chose to save me and so what more can I do but give my life to the pursuit of Him! 


He is the only one who eternally satisfies the soul that is thirsty for the love of God. 


Am I now perfect and sinless? Far From It. My best deeds are filthy rags. Hence my desire to continue to pursue God, so that I might become a little more like him and a little less like my sinful self. 










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